First off, I'm very sad that there are no gifs of The Rege on the World Wide Web. Regis & Kathie Lee were my go-to before walking to the bus stop in middle school, and that I didn't catch him with Kelly when visiting New York is a lasting regret.
So last Friday, I was OUTTA CONTROL. Before we were saying "all the feels," Rege was manically gesturing and over-emoting. I had "all the Rege" if you will.
It was 10 p.m. Friday night; I was reading, Alex was watching football, and one innocent "Whatcha thinkin' about, honey?" from my spouse sent me straight into all the Rege (ATR).
"I feel like I'm outta control! I have no plan! What are we even doing? What do I even do? Rachel doesn't need me, the kids are in school, and I'm chubby! Maybe I should just go full-on cliche and join a stupid gym like every other mom.... I mean I know I'm not really that bad and we have a home and everyone is okay... I mean there was a Dad at the office (a shared office space for our speech therapist and a family psychologist) who was late for a meeting for a court appointed child evaluation with the doctor and he was begging for a second chance and the doctor was going to tell his judicator, and I'm not sure exactly what that is but I know it's not good... THIS IS WHAT I THINK ABOUT WHEN I'M NOT WATCHING GILMORE GIRLS OR READING A NOVEL."
Hello and welcome to my crazy.
My counters are messy and the bathroom smells and oh-my-gosh what am I even doing with my life?
I'm making this lighthearted, but I had one of my semi-annual crisis-of-confidence/emotional overflows and mercifully this one was in the privacy of my home (I don't have the best track record).
My sweet husband. I mean the guy asked all the right things, assured me that yes, I do a bit around here and add value to our home and life, and going back to work (in the vague future) should not be driven by primarily by finances. Plus we've had a newborn every two years for a good stretch and maybe I'm thrown by not having a wee thing to keep alive.
The man is a gem. Also, he gets me. (Random aside: Go see "The Intern" for a textbook female freak out with the Anne Hathaway character lamenting to the Robert DeNiro character that she cannot be buried in the stranger/single/alone section of the cemetery.)
All of this to say... check out my efforts to reign in the chaos:
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| I may have a few responsibilities to fill my time. |
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| It has a section for important papers and I've even added a meal plan to the margins. HAPPY DAYS ARE HERE AGAIN! |
I even went inside a gym. And used it. And took a class and planked and everything.
I've accomplished my major goal for each day this week and I'm thinking about some online work to get myself in gear for virtual teaching.
*tosses hat in air*
I'm gonna make it after all.
(Regis and Mary Tyler Moore references... I aim to please.)
