Friday, May 31, 2013

Eating Raisins: My Daughter's Approach to Living Life

As I've mentioned in earlier posts about J's therapy approach, we take a lot of video at home, capturing little activties designed to foster emotional connection with him and build his compentence and confidence. I was playing back this clip of us making oatmeal raisin cookies together with Sarah.  I love how video captures something that went unnoticed in the moment.  Here's 45 seconds of my daughter enjoying life.  It's hilarious.


Here's a picture of Jeremiah's 5th birthday.  I threw out the dog and pony show this year, and did a simple dinner and ice cream for us.


The elusive "perfect family picture" continues to evade me. It's my unicorn.  But here we are, looking somewhat at the camera. As well as well attired.  Because that's what really matters, am I right, ladies?


Happy Friday.  Go eat your raisins.

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Birth Day Memories, Transcribed

Jeremiah's 5th birthday is Wednesday, and I realized that while his sisters' birth days were recorded here, his was not.  Before blogging, my firstborn got the expected treatment: his story was written in ink, in cursive, on fine paper in a leather journal. This excerpt was written when J was 3 months old. It's exuberant and totally, charmingly naive.  5 years later, the sentiment's still the same. 
Happy Birthday, Baby Boy.

Your delivery...

My due date of May 26th came and went. I was not worried about the date passing, but all the waiting drove your Dad crazy. The house was clean and organized; your nursery was ready; we were ready for the main event.

We made the decision to go into the hospital on a Wednesday night, May 28th to be induced to labor. My doctor, Dr. Dodder, was on duty the next day and I wanted her to deliver you.

We brought lots of snacks, movies, and all our creature comforts to the hospital. (I packed according to "The Book".  We rolled into Northside Hospital prepared for a fun lock-in. Movies? Bless my idiotic heart.) Now that we were at the hospital, your dad was more relaxed.  While he slept that first night, I tossed and turned. The sleeping medicine I took gave me strange dreams, so I didn't feel rested! The pitocin medicine began at 6 a.m. I was 1 cm dilated, which was a start because nothing was happening before we came to the hospital. Sometime around lunch my water broke. Natalie, Nana, Papa and Grandma arrived near lunchtime, too. They were excited and very talkative! I was beginning to feel my contractions more strongly at this time, so I was glad your Dad took them to lunch. My peaceful moment was short lived, because the contractions kept increasing in strength.  Dad had only been gone 20 minutes, but I was ready for him to return! (I called him and subtly hinted he needed to get back.)

About this time, I was ready for a little pain relief.  I received some medicine and felt well enough to get out of bed and rock for about an hour.  Then... the contractions felt more intense and closer together.  A friend from work stopped by, Wagner, and I chatted with him in between contractions. (Totally insane, though it kept me distracted.) I had been worried that I would lose my cool during delivery and lash out in anger, but I didn't. It simply would have required too much energy. The room was quiet and dark. Finally, I was able to receive an epidural, probably around 3 p.m. The doctor was great-- Dr. Wheeler.  He did everything quickly and efficiently. I asked him if anyone named their baby "Wheeler". Seriously, I would understand why!

After I was given the medicine, my friend Lara from church visited us. I was feeling less anxious and up for a visit.  About 10 minutes in, the nurse came in and checked my progress. I was still feeling contractions and worried the medicine didn't take on both sides. (I was "still feeling contractions." Again.  Bless.  What I elegantly told the nurse: "I feel it in my butt." Sorry if a fella reads this. Um, that's baby bearing down.  When the doctor said, "You're complete," I had no idea what that meant.) Here's the best part of the labor: it went from 0 to 60! I was fully dilated (I had only been 2 cm about an hour before). We thought we would be delivering you late at night. My reaction to the news? "I feel like I've won the lottery!"  I couldn't believe I'd fast forwarded through the long, hard wait of labor. (I guess the 9 hours before the epidural didn't register as "hard labor" at the time.) It was showtime.

My doctor was called and we did a few "practice" pushes. Lara coached me through those, which was neat and unplanned. She knew your dad and I planned to welcome you alone, so she went out to the families and acted as a go-between with updates.

Your delivery was wonderful. I believe that getting off to such a good start went a long way in helping me adjust to motherhood. The pushing seemed natural, and you were delivered quickly.  The first thing I saw was all that dark hair!  Your labor and delivery went so well that I didn't cry as most do. I think I said "awesome" as you were delivered. I was able to hold you immediately and nurse you. Again, this was easy and natural. I ate dinner as you were washed and tended to. Your Nana came in and announced, "Bring me my grandson and take my picture!"

All babies are beautiful, but you are my baby. Long fingers, skinny legs, a sweet face, and lots of hair. Every day I see you, you become more precious and beautiful. Your face is my favorite thing to look at. You have filled out now: bright eyes, chubby cheeks, a bow mouth, a heart-shaped face finished off by your pointed chin. I know I don't understand how much you've changed and added to my life.

Someone asked me if I loved you instantly. I did-- but it didn't "hit" me. It just was. I was your mother and everything about you did, does, and will bring me joy. (More true now than I could have known then.) 

I love you, Jeremiah Christopher. Welcome to the world!

Love,
Mama