Sunday, October 3, 2010

Deeeep Thoughts...

With Melissa.

1.  I pulled out a college photo album to rob it of 4 x 6 photo pages to put in my coupon binder.  Yup.  I did it.  It's obnoxious. 

2.  Looking at those pictures of me at about age 19 to 20, I cannot believe what a kid I was just a few years ago.  Didn't have a clue.  Or a care.  I wonder what I'll think of myself now when I'm 40?  Shudder. 

3.  Those pictures I pulled out were so precious to me back then and moreso, the people in the pictures.  Most I will never see in person again; a few I exchange emails with, even fewer I pick up the phone to call.  The passage of time never ceases to baffle me.

3. Today, I managed to throw out two passive-agressive judgements on two perfectly nice women without even realizing it.  One on a lady who has her own natural children and it providing foster care for others.  One is getting pets with small children in the home.  Anything wrong with that? No. Not at all.  Yet, I somehow manage to slide in some off-handed comment that implies "You must be crazy to do what you are doing because I never would/could do that."  I am realizing that I do that a lot in an effort to make conversation or an attempt at humor.  Different is different, not better or worse.  When someone does something that I think is out of the norm (all the parenting/schooling/family size debates), that does not mean they are wrong.  Why do I/we do this?  I guess it's insecurity.  Mea culpa.  My bad.

Now I'm going to look in my mirror and say my daily affirmations.  Say it with me, y'all. 

"I'm good enough.  I'm smart enough.  And doggone it, people like me!"

Now,  don't we all feel better?

(Really, I like me.  And you.  Hugs, not drugs!)

I just made myself laugh.

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