Happy 3rd Birthday, Jeremiah!
Sunday, May 29, 2011
Saturday, May 21, 2011
Don'ts and Do's
A blog is much like Wikipedia. Anyone can write one, so you know the information is accurate. (Thanks, Michael Scott). At the tutoring center where I work, three young ladies are getting married. I love weddings. I've already admitted to registry stalking. Without further ado, here are:
Don'ts
1. Overthink and Overstress: My breaking point was that the dyeable bridesmaids' shoes were not the exact same shade as their dresses. Think blush and bashful, friends. Mix and match. Not just match. Also, seating charts don't matter. In the grand scheme of things, ivory versus bone invitations don't either. Nor does the intricate pattern on your china, bubbles versus birdseed, ice sculptures, bird releases, and all the garage the wedding industry shoves your way. It's a big day, and it deserves special attention. But those small things are not what you will remember. Trust me.
2. Try to lose a ridiculous amount of weight. The brides-to-be I mentioned are all dieting. None could be over a size 10. (Please don't think I'm saying size 12 and up are fat.) All look healthy and slim. Really. Get your dress to fit your body and pick the dress that flatters you, not necessarily what's most in fashion currently.
3. Slouch. I think it could be generational, but today's youth are slouchers. As in their posture. I wish someone had been in charge of making me stand up straight, because I slouched in a lot of my pictures and wish I hadn't.
4. Act a Fool. This goes back to number 1. Don't diva out. Be gracious. Stay on top of thank yous. Don't put presents away until the note is written. Do something nice for your parents. Thank them. Tip everyone.
5. Let the Moment Pass You By. This day may be one of the only times in your life where everyone important to you is in one place. Be yourself. If you want to cry, cry. I wore a goofy grin and cried and laughed and danced with all the groomsmen. Drug my new husband around the floor for each specially selected song. Danced with my sister. So, take pictures with everyone. Eat the cake. And the groom's cake. Lift your glass, whether it's Sprite or champagne. Kiss that man 100 times. It's an awesome day. Celebrate it.
Do's
1. Take time to set goals. Weird for a wedding tip, but this is more for the marriage. What do you want your marriage to look like? What tangible steps will you take towards creating a good marriage? Do it now, because the busyness of life will come after your resolve.
2. Have a wingman. You need your support system and you especially need someone to keep you in line. When you get so absorbed in the minutiae that you can't think straight, you need someone to bring you back to reality. Hopefully, your fiance can be a voice of reason, but you need someone else who can bring you objectivity. The Mother of the Bride and Mother of the Groom are probably already planning baby names, and your best girlfriends are more than likely in the throes of their own romances, so find someone who has been-there-done-that and lived to laugh at it.
3. Prioritize. Weddings are costly, no matter the budget, so decide what is most important. For me, it was pictures and music. Then venue and flowers and food. Not elaborate favors or over-the-top "wow" moments.
4. Accept help. If someone wants to throw you your 15th shower, let them. This is not just your day. While you have the right to have your wedding follow your tastes, be sensitive to those in your life that want to be included.
5. Be Thankful. It was hard to think of a fitting end to this list, but I think this covers them all. Don't forget to take time for your other relationships, especially your spiritual one. It makes the day all the sweeter.
Again, I love weddings. I have a family wedding to attend this August. Got my dress. I'll RSVP, buy off the registry, and otherwise be a good guest. And most importantly, I'll "get down with my bad self," because life is to be lived!
Now, go forth and wed (or be wedded) well!
Lis' Wedding Don'ts and Do's
(My parents call me Lis when I'm being bossy, which is most of the time, so the title fits) Don'ts
1. Overthink and Overstress: My breaking point was that the dyeable bridesmaids' shoes were not the exact same shade as their dresses. Think blush and bashful, friends. Mix and match. Not just match. Also, seating charts don't matter. In the grand scheme of things, ivory versus bone invitations don't either. Nor does the intricate pattern on your china, bubbles versus birdseed, ice sculptures, bird releases, and all the garage the wedding industry shoves your way. It's a big day, and it deserves special attention. But those small things are not what you will remember. Trust me.
2. Try to lose a ridiculous amount of weight. The brides-to-be I mentioned are all dieting. None could be over a size 10. (Please don't think I'm saying size 12 and up are fat.) All look healthy and slim. Really. Get your dress to fit your body and pick the dress that flatters you, not necessarily what's most in fashion currently.
3. Slouch. I think it could be generational, but today's youth are slouchers. As in their posture. I wish someone had been in charge of making me stand up straight, because I slouched in a lot of my pictures and wish I hadn't.
4. Act a Fool. This goes back to number 1. Don't diva out. Be gracious. Stay on top of thank yous. Don't put presents away until the note is written. Do something nice for your parents. Thank them. Tip everyone.
5. Let the Moment Pass You By. This day may be one of the only times in your life where everyone important to you is in one place. Be yourself. If you want to cry, cry. I wore a goofy grin and cried and laughed and danced with all the groomsmen. Drug my new husband around the floor for each specially selected song. Danced with my sister. So, take pictures with everyone. Eat the cake. And the groom's cake. Lift your glass, whether it's Sprite or champagne. Kiss that man 100 times. It's an awesome day. Celebrate it.
Do's
1. Take time to set goals. Weird for a wedding tip, but this is more for the marriage. What do you want your marriage to look like? What tangible steps will you take towards creating a good marriage? Do it now, because the busyness of life will come after your resolve.
2. Have a wingman. You need your support system and you especially need someone to keep you in line. When you get so absorbed in the minutiae that you can't think straight, you need someone to bring you back to reality. Hopefully, your fiance can be a voice of reason, but you need someone else who can bring you objectivity. The Mother of the Bride and Mother of the Groom are probably already planning baby names, and your best girlfriends are more than likely in the throes of their own romances, so find someone who has been-there-done-that and lived to laugh at it.
3. Prioritize. Weddings are costly, no matter the budget, so decide what is most important. For me, it was pictures and music. Then venue and flowers and food. Not elaborate favors or over-the-top "wow" moments.
4. Accept help. If someone wants to throw you your 15th shower, let them. This is not just your day. While you have the right to have your wedding follow your tastes, be sensitive to those in your life that want to be included.
5. Be Thankful. It was hard to think of a fitting end to this list, but I think this covers them all. Don't forget to take time for your other relationships, especially your spiritual one. It makes the day all the sweeter.
Again, I love weddings. I have a family wedding to attend this August. Got my dress. I'll RSVP, buy off the registry, and otherwise be a good guest. And most importantly, I'll "get down with my bad self," because life is to be lived!
Now, go forth and wed (or be wedded) well!
See? I followed my advice.
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
The Graduate
Before kids, I didn't understand preschool. Thought parents who put their two-year-olds in a preschool were, well, shriking their responsibilities. Even insulted a preschool teacher's job to her face (passively, of course). Oooh. Bless my heart. What can I say? I was just plain ignorant.
Life has a way of making you eat your words real quick. Today was the last day of Jeremiah's preschool and his graduation. Before kids, I'd probably mumble under my breath about how silly such events are, and how they undermine true achievement.
But now that I have my own, I'd be pretty hard-hearted to disparge an event that celebrates children. Once I joined the ranks of parenthood, my eyes were opened to how extraordinary life really is. How fragile and fleeting. I personally know two families who are dealing with childhood cancer. So getting dressed up and singing sweet songs and making a big deal of another year of life passed? I'm for it. Still shots, video, blog updates? Yes, yes, and yes.
To Old Me: I've read John Rosemond. I agree with most of it. I know the difference between self-esteem and self-confidence. I know my child should not be the center of my existence: my god. I know that intrinstic motivation can be diminshed by external rewards. And I still agree with all of this. But now, I have a weekend's worth of experience. My attitude's changed.
My child sang "Jesus Loves Me" without tearing off the stage, screaming. So I am celebrating today. He is sleeping under my roof tonight, healthy. And I am grateful.
Deal with that, Old Cynical Me. You have just eaten your words.
Life has a way of making you eat your words real quick. Today was the last day of Jeremiah's preschool and his graduation. Before kids, I'd probably mumble under my breath about how silly such events are, and how they undermine true achievement.
But now that I have my own, I'd be pretty hard-hearted to disparge an event that celebrates children. Once I joined the ranks of parenthood, my eyes were opened to how extraordinary life really is. How fragile and fleeting. I personally know two families who are dealing with childhood cancer. So getting dressed up and singing sweet songs and making a big deal of another year of life passed? I'm for it. Still shots, video, blog updates? Yes, yes, and yes.
To Old Me: I've read John Rosemond. I agree with most of it. I know the difference between self-esteem and self-confidence. I know my child should not be the center of my existence: my god. I know that intrinstic motivation can be diminshed by external rewards. And I still agree with all of this. But now, I have a weekend's worth of experience. My attitude's changed.
My child sang "Jesus Loves Me" without tearing off the stage, screaming. So I am celebrating today. He is sleeping under my roof tonight, healthy. And I am grateful.
Deal with that, Old Cynical Me. You have just eaten your words.
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
J.K.I.R.
Just Keepin' It Real. I think this phrase has reached its saturation point. It's the modern Bless Her Heart. Have you ever pulled this phrase out to cover an overshare, maybe the details of your child's bathroom habits or a piece of "information" about someone, such as "I know I shouldn't judge, but can you believe..."?
I find myself saying JKIR frequently. And if I use it as a conversational diversionary tactic, how real am I keepin' it, yo? Bless My Heart.
What are your pet phrases?
I find myself saying JKIR frequently. And if I use it as a conversational diversionary tactic, how real am I keepin' it, yo? Bless My Heart.
What are your pet phrases?
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
Mother's Day Gifts: A How-To Guide
I just returned from buying Mother's Day cards, and I'm so eager to pontificate on the subject of Mother's Day that I had to sit down and write it now.
First of all, this day is a big deal. BIG deal. It's not just a token day. I'm preaching to the choir on this one, but trust me if you don't already feel this way. It's big.
You don't have to be far along into motherhood to understand what a tremendous thing your mother did by birthing or adopting, loving, and raising you. No matter her shortcomings or failings, because even the best mother is still human, your mother is worthy of praise and respect every day, and especially on Mother's Day.
Fathers and sons: This is a big deal to your wife and mom. She probably cooks your meals, washes your clothes, cheers you when you're down, praises you when you're up, and does a hundred other things for you of which you may be unaware. You are *it* in her eyes. So spend a little time and thought and thank her!
I am a big believer in letting your loved ones know what you like. I'm not shy about coming out and telling my husband exactly what I'd like, whether it is a monetary gift or not. So go ahead and tell them!
Here are my ideas. I am not quite an arbiter of good taste, but I think I'm reasonably well informed!
The New Mother or Mother-to-Be: Jewelry. It's time to ante up, big boy. If your wife is giving birth to your child, especially your first child, she deserves a precious metal or stone. This does not have to cost a fortune; you can get a nice necklace or earrings for under $100. A pair of pearl earrings, a necklace charm, or a nice, engraved silver bracelet would be a wonderful gift. This is probably the most disposable income you'll have for a while, so go for it!
The Mother of Babies and Preschoolers: Special keepsakes are what I treasure. Here are some things I love:
* a special picture of your children with mom
* hand impressions of little ones
* photo books
* beauty services (hair, nails, spa certificates)
Anything that involves careful thought will be a wonderful gift.
The Mother of School Aged Children: I believe this is the beginning of the chauffeur years. Mom's driving, scheduling, and doing a lot. Here are some thoughts:
* a market tote (to carry all her stuff. and your stuff. and their stuff.)
* an updated Ipod play list (the modern mix tape)
*anything personalized. You can never go wrong with monogramming.
The Mother of Teenagers: This mother is hanging on for dear life. She needs to laugh and vent. Some suggestions:
* Comedy DVD (A chick flick or comedy special) My favorites are Sinbad, Anita Renfroe, and anything by Jane Austen or the Brontes made into a movie or mini-series. It's a lock.
* A Kindle or Nook
* A preloaded Starbucks card (really loaded... not just $5). The woman needs to flee sometimes.
* A detailed (custom cleaned, vacuumed, and scented) mini-van. She's been driving that thing for a while now and it has lost some swagger.
*Tickets to a show. Your kids can watch themselves for a few hours. It won't kill you to sit through a musical. And no smart remarks.
The Mother of Young Adults:
* A weekend away (Bed & Breakfast certificate or even a mini-cruise) She's made it. Your offspring are in relative stages of self-sufficiency. Now is the time to celebrate.
*A letter of thanks. By this I mean sitting down and free handing a serious letter recalling specific examples of qualities you are thankful for in your wife or mother. This could be the most precious thing you give her if you will take the time and energy to do it right.
The Grandmother: This woman has come full circle. She is reaping the rewards of her investment. This should be a slam dunk.
* Anything you would give a young mother-- keepsakes of the babies!
*Anything that says her special grandmother name: Nana, Grandma, et cetera.
* Time. If you do not live in the same town, schedule a long weekend visit soon.
The Aunts and other Special Women in your life: These ladies need to be remembered. They have mothered and celebrated you, too. Don't forget to buy them a card with a personalized note (not just Love, Me) and include pictures and drawings. Flowers never hurt, either.
Some links:
Things Remembered for monogrammed keepsakes
ProFlowers
Pandora Jewelry
Kindle and Nook
Apple Pie Ridge- great B&B in North Georgia
Chateau Elan- luxurious North Atlanta getaway with spa for her and golf for him
The Fox Theatre
Don't forget: Buy or make a card now-- one from you and one from the kids. No joke cards from husbands. Plan something special, whether is is pancakes in bed, a nice brunch, or a purchased gift. Or all three! Go wild, go overboard, go crazy! She loves you and she is worth the fuss. Tell her!
And all of God's people said, "Amen."
Blog Shout-Outs:
Love you, Mom! I know you are enjoying your hard-earned reward! Miss you Nanny and MaMaw! Thank you, Deanne, MIL and Grandma, who did an excellent job with your sons and I'm reaping your hard work! All my aunts: Susan and Debbie who treat me like their own daughter, Jan and Kris who adore our kids-- love and thanks. Great-Grandma Beverly, you are such a spunky grandma! My sister, Natalie, who is the best aunt to Jeremiah and Sarah--we're so lucky to have you.
We love you all.
First of all, this day is a big deal. BIG deal. It's not just a token day. I'm preaching to the choir on this one, but trust me if you don't already feel this way. It's big.
You don't have to be far along into motherhood to understand what a tremendous thing your mother did by birthing or adopting, loving, and raising you. No matter her shortcomings or failings, because even the best mother is still human, your mother is worthy of praise and respect every day, and especially on Mother's Day.
Fathers and sons: This is a big deal to your wife and mom. She probably cooks your meals, washes your clothes, cheers you when you're down, praises you when you're up, and does a hundred other things for you of which you may be unaware. You are *it* in her eyes. So spend a little time and thought and thank her!
I am a big believer in letting your loved ones know what you like. I'm not shy about coming out and telling my husband exactly what I'd like, whether it is a monetary gift or not. So go ahead and tell them!
Here are my ideas. I am not quite an arbiter of good taste, but I think I'm reasonably well informed!
The New Mother or Mother-to-Be: Jewelry. It's time to ante up, big boy. If your wife is giving birth to your child, especially your first child, she deserves a precious metal or stone. This does not have to cost a fortune; you can get a nice necklace or earrings for under $100. A pair of pearl earrings, a necklace charm, or a nice, engraved silver bracelet would be a wonderful gift. This is probably the most disposable income you'll have for a while, so go for it!
The Mother of Babies and Preschoolers: Special keepsakes are what I treasure. Here are some things I love:
* a special picture of your children with mom
* hand impressions of little ones
* photo books
* beauty services (hair, nails, spa certificates)
Anything that involves careful thought will be a wonderful gift.
The Mother of School Aged Children: I believe this is the beginning of the chauffeur years. Mom's driving, scheduling, and doing a lot. Here are some thoughts:
* a market tote (to carry all her stuff. and your stuff. and their stuff.)
* an updated Ipod play list (the modern mix tape)
*anything personalized. You can never go wrong with monogramming.
The Mother of Teenagers: This mother is hanging on for dear life. She needs to laugh and vent. Some suggestions:
* Comedy DVD (A chick flick or comedy special) My favorites are Sinbad, Anita Renfroe, and anything by Jane Austen or the Brontes made into a movie or mini-series. It's a lock.
* A Kindle or Nook
* A preloaded Starbucks card (really loaded... not just $5). The woman needs to flee sometimes.
* A detailed (custom cleaned, vacuumed, and scented) mini-van. She's been driving that thing for a while now and it has lost some swagger.
*Tickets to a show. Your kids can watch themselves for a few hours. It won't kill you to sit through a musical. And no smart remarks.
The Mother of Young Adults:
* A weekend away (Bed & Breakfast certificate or even a mini-cruise) She's made it. Your offspring are in relative stages of self-sufficiency. Now is the time to celebrate.
*A letter of thanks. By this I mean sitting down and free handing a serious letter recalling specific examples of qualities you are thankful for in your wife or mother. This could be the most precious thing you give her if you will take the time and energy to do it right.
The Grandmother: This woman has come full circle. She is reaping the rewards of her investment. This should be a slam dunk.
* Anything you would give a young mother-- keepsakes of the babies!
*Anything that says her special grandmother name: Nana, Grandma, et cetera.
* Time. If you do not live in the same town, schedule a long weekend visit soon.
The Aunts and other Special Women in your life: These ladies need to be remembered. They have mothered and celebrated you, too. Don't forget to buy them a card with a personalized note (not just Love, Me) and include pictures and drawings. Flowers never hurt, either.
Some links:
Things Remembered for monogrammed keepsakes
ProFlowers
Pandora Jewelry
Kindle and Nook
Apple Pie Ridge- great B&B in North Georgia
Chateau Elan- luxurious North Atlanta getaway with spa for her and golf for him
The Fox Theatre
Don't forget: Buy or make a card now-- one from you and one from the kids. No joke cards from husbands. Plan something special, whether is is pancakes in bed, a nice brunch, or a purchased gift. Or all three! Go wild, go overboard, go crazy! She loves you and she is worth the fuss. Tell her!
And all of God's people said, "Amen."
Blog Shout-Outs:
Love you, Mom! I know you are enjoying your hard-earned reward! Miss you Nanny and MaMaw! Thank you, Deanne, MIL and Grandma, who did an excellent job with your sons and I'm reaping your hard work! All my aunts: Susan and Debbie who treat me like their own daughter, Jan and Kris who adore our kids-- love and thanks. Great-Grandma Beverly, you are such a spunky grandma! My sister, Natalie, who is the best aunt to Jeremiah and Sarah--we're so lucky to have you.
We love you all.
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